From Chili Slinger to Campaign Finance Miracle Worker: The Dynamic Story of Chris Trail

ometime in March, or maybe it was April, 2009, - at any rate only a few short months ago - a gentleman by the name of Chris Trail moves from Berryhill, West of Tulsa, in the City of Sand Springs Ward 4, to East Tulsa Council District 5. As he was working one day and as the legend goes:

1 And on that day, a bright, blinding light shone through all around him and a voice was heard from on high. "Chris, it is I, do not be afraid. 2 Ye shall go forth unto the City of Tulsa, and ye shall march around the gates of the city four times. Yea, Four to "Fix" the City. 3 And on the last half of the last cubit, ye shall walk into the city gate, after checking in with the security guard, and ye shall register thineself to the candidacy of Councilor, Prince of the District of Five, City of Tulsa, State of Oklahoma, 4 And ye shall henceforth and therefrom be elected into that office, and ye shall have large amounts of money set before you. Just as I have said it, so it will be." 5 And Chris made his way unto the city of Tulsa, and was obedient, 6 and favor shone all about him, and unto all of his livestock, and unto all of his bondservants.

From that moment in time, I'd never heard of Chris Trail. In fact, as the legend goes, the most notoriety Chris Trail ever got was from alleged felony arrests, IRS levies, Oklahoma Tax Commission investigations, and the health department. Oh, and there was the matter of some smallish fabrications about all of this on some candidate questionnaire. This part is not really important.

As the story goes, in only a very, very short period of time - literally weeks - the political dynamo of Chris Trail moves into the Magic Circle neighborhood in "The City Tulsa, District of Five" and becomes a stalwart of his community and an instant hero to some very well to do people in this fair city.

This is an amazing story of the American Dream come true right here in Tulsa! Pay attention, because it gets really good. So good, it almost sounds illegal.

Besides all of the trivial legal formalities mentioned above, there were other setbacks. When there was some question about when Prince Trail moved into his new district, which would affect his ability to run in that district, the right Mr. Martinson, within the rules, filed a protest. But no one could keep the upright Prince Trail down. It was his destiny!

Turns out, the election board heard the testimony of an eye witness who said they saw his furniture in that house. How they magically knew it was his furniture, only the gods know for sure.